Looking at the results of my Johari window so far, it doesn't seem that I know myself all that well - which is what I had suspected, so I'm glad that people are telling me. I considered getting a Nohari window too (a negative attributes window), but I figured that it is not the best way to receive criticism. I'm still unsure about criticism. I've talked with Mara about this, and it was a big topic when I worked at Camp Mountainview, but I haven't drawn any 'conclusions' (you know what I mean). Is it a good thing to confront people about sin? Is it a good thing to tell people about their unconsious shortcomings if you would want them to do the same for you? It's a difficult topic, but a very practical one compared to most debates I get into.
Warning: Spoiler for "The Great Gatsby" to follow. If you have not read "The Great Gatsby", wish to, and dislike people telling you about a book before you've read it (as I do), skip the italics.
This topic has been rolling around in my mind this week because of "The Great Gatsby". The story follows Nick as he is a witness to many people doing immoral things, such as cheating, lying, commiting adultry, and lastly, killing. In the end, Nick says nothing, so no one is punished for what they have done, no one learns from their mistakes, and everyone is left feeling that they are pretty good people who simply came accross unfortunate circumstances.
So what do you think? Should we confront people about sin? If so, when?
Warning: Spoiler for "The Great Gatsby" to follow. If you have not read "The Great Gatsby", wish to, and dislike people telling you about a book before you've read it (as I do), skip the italics.
This topic has been rolling around in my mind this week because of "The Great Gatsby". The story follows Nick as he is a witness to many people doing immoral things, such as cheating, lying, commiting adultry, and lastly, killing. In the end, Nick says nothing, so no one is punished for what they have done, no one learns from their mistakes, and everyone is left feeling that they are pretty good people who simply came accross unfortunate circumstances.
So what do you think? Should we confront people about sin? If so, when?
David whispered at 4:37 p.m.
2 Comments:
Hey David, great question.
I think there's a difference between confronting sinners about their sin and confronting fellow believers about sin.
The Bible tells us that, within the church, we should "teach and admonish" one another(Colossians 3:16).
As for confronting non-believers about sin, that's a tough one, because they don't necessarily have that faith that provides the foundation for our moral standards. From the perspective of popular culture, the attitude might be "who do you think you are, trying to tell other people how they should live".
That said, I have found in my experience that I can "give advice" to non-believers that is grounded in the morality of scripture. As well, when I am with a group of "immoral people", my lifestyle is conspicuous enough to "admonish" without saying a word (at least, that's my hope, and I've been told that by non-believers in the past).
I personally believe that, whether they show it or not, the people caught in immorality are fully aware of their guilt and feel more shame than they know what to do with. Often, they don't know how to name it, because they have never had the spiritual teaching that we have had. Rather than add to their feelings of guilt and their resentment against legalism they feel is impossible to live up to, I prefer to share as much grace and mercy as I am able...
Very long comment for me. I'm sure it sounds much more pious than I really am, so forgive me for that!
it's entirely unreasonable to expect people who aren't Jesus-followers to strive toward becoming more Christ-like (i.e. not sinning). i mean, how ludicrous would it be for me to expect my father (not artsy) to think and act more like an artist, despite the fact that he has not shown any desire to assume that as his identity? if, however, he had decided to become an artist but was not producing any work, visiting galleries, studying art history or reading about contemporary art theories and ideas...i think, based on a loving relationship, it would be totally appropriate for me to be like, "hey pops, what the cheese do you think you're doing?! you should really consider getting your act together!" except probably not phrased in exactly that manner. that would just be weird.
anyway, that was a roundabout way of saying that Christians probably shouldn't impose their standard on other people (except in the case of injustice, in which case, fight 'til your fists bleed, baby.) because it just doesn't make sense. as for dealing with fellow believers...i think exhortation is important. so is sensitivity. so is listening to God. so is love. i think if you have those things together, you'd probably do okay.
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